Every year around this time we are overrun by Cupid and his minions – the Chocolate Makers and the Florists. Not a problem – I am a chocoholic myself. But the most important thing to realize on Valentine’s Day is how amazing it is that love is so important to us. It’s the greatest evidence that there is something out of this world going on in this one.
There must be a God, because otherwise how on earth would a concept as impractical and intangible as love actually come to be so powerful that it could eventually rule the world.
Just a few months ago we celebrated the coming of Christ. He came here to bring the new covenant – and to assure that God so loved man He gave His only son to be sacrificed for our salvation. He preached on this earth for 33 years a simple message – to love God and each other as ourselves.
In those 33 years that He walked the earth, scores of the world’s most powerful men tried to stop him from spreading His message of love. From the Emperor who tried to prevent his birth and end his life at infancy to the Pharisees and church leaders who tried to belittle and disqualify his message, he continually thwarted all their efforts and not only to succeeded dramatically at spreading his message but was able to amass a following that would be the envy of any of today’s greatest, most successful and powerful world leaders.
He did it all without money, without an army, without any station or backing and without offering those who followed any of the typical worldly rewards that most ambitious leaders today offer.
To the contrary, this simple man offered hardship, struggle and the realization that life on this earth would never be what we wanted it to be. Nor should we even ask or expect it to be.
In a world that was at that time centered entirely on power and how to use it, he offered a completely new idea of a life based not on domination of others or the satiation of our animal desires. But for the first time in history here was a man who suggested a new vision of existence that claimed the entire point of our lives was to love others and revel in the love of God and our brothers and sisters.
The amazing success he had with that uncommon message was echoed exponentially after his death and resurrection. From a simple initial following of 12 apostles, his message of love has now been accepted by over 2 billion in the world who call themselves Christian.
And how many others accept His call to love even though they might say they don’t believe in Christ? How many major movies, books, and works of art nowadays cite “love” as their goal? Even the band at halftime during the SuperBowl a few weeks ago spelled out “love” in lights during their performance.
How many world leaders routinely say (at least they claim) that they are committed to love of mankind? In Christ’s era, nobody could even dream that the world’s most powerful men would talk of “love”.
Now it’s true that many of these love devotees may not really appreciate the deep commitment to and respect for the dignity of human life. But still the realization that the majority of the world is now devoted at least in name to the goal that Christ set as the new goal of man 2000 years ago is beyond comprehension; it is nothing short of – well – a miracle.
And it’s a mighty wonderful realization to reflect on this Valentine’s Day as we reach out to love all those around us.
Let’s start the year off right and realize how incredible all of us are. When push comes to shove, we love more than hate, we help more than hurt, and we care more than we care less about others. Let’s remember all those wonderful people out there who helped all the rest of us wonderful people make it through another year.
I have more of an opportunity than most to see that outpouring of love by writing stories about people reaching out to others, and giving talks to people from all walks of life all over America who tell me their wonderful accounts of those who rose to meet the needs of others.
Like the outpouring of emails and supportive notes I received after my last column when I wrote of the young mother who almost wound up on the streets because of a temporary financial hardship. Not only did so many of you sympathize with her, but one reader even offered her a free house to live in for a few months if she needed to get back on her feet.
Or the young lady who came to one of my talks and spoke passionately about her financial woes after losing her father, her marriage and her job, all within a few months. Within minutes she was embraced by several in the crowd who offered guidance, understanding and job references. Later in the year she showed up at a totally unrelated Catholic gathering brimming with joy – and employment – having found solidarity and support from the many who reached out to help in the Catholic community.
With times tough all over, the cynics would expect self-serving people to be hoarding, not offering, whatever blessings they had to others.
But therein lies the rub. We are independent in America, but by no means selfish. We are constantly looking for ways to help others, especially when the chips are down.
That’s why giving to charity continued to be upwards of $300 billion last year yet again.
That’s why the crime rate is down, even as unemployment and frustrations are up.
That’s why the divorce rate is down, as families realize it’s better to stick together.
And that’s why, despite all the troubles and tribulations, we continue to love each other, to help each other, and to spur each other on as if we were inexorably connected – as if we were all part of something bigger than ourselves.
We are part of something more – it’s called the Body of Christ.
When we remember that, we rediscover our reason for being and our courage to push on amidst the steady stream of pain, suffering and struggle.
So as we continue to fight the good fight, let’s not forget what we are fighting for. Here’s a helpful reminder, a list of five questions to refresh your memory. Fill it out and fill up your life with all the love that’s already there.
Happy New Year!
Road map to happiness
- Who do you love (pick one person) and why are they so special to you?
- What’s the nicest thing anybody ever did for you and how did it inspire or help you?
- What’s the kindest thing you ever did for anybody else that helped to make their day or their life better? How has helping that person enhanced your own life?
- What is something positive that you saw somebody else do yesterday or today to help someone else which filled your heart with happiness? It could be a family member, a friend or even a complete stranger who you felt made somebody happy.
- Who loves you and how do they show it? How has their love changed your life?
October 16th
10 am
St. Rose’s Parent/Teen Picnic and Retreat
Good Shepherd Mission
45033 North 12th Street
New River, AZ
A Grand Canyon University Sponsored Event
October 24th
7 pm
St. Theresa’s Youth Group
St. Theresa Parish
5045 E. Thomas Road
Phoenix, AZ
A Grand Canyon University Sponsored Event
October 30th
Singles Talk
Mount Claret
4633 N. 54th Street
Phoenix, AZ
A Grand Canyon University Sponsored Event
November 8th
8 am
Seton High School
Featured Keynote to School Assembly
7 pm
Talk to Parents
1150 N Dobson Road
Chandler , AZ
A Grand Canyon University Sponsored Event
November 19-20
Overcoming Life’s 7 Common Tragedies Retreat
Bishop de Falco Retreat Center
2100 North Spring
Amarillo, TX
806-383-1811
December 1st
7 pm
Holy Cross Youth Group
1244 S. Power Rd.
Mesa AZ
A Grand Canyon University Sponsored Event
December 4th
Advent Parish Mission/St. Rose’s
Good Shepherd Mission
45033 North 12th Street
New River, AZ
A Grand Canyon University Sponsored Event
ALL OUT OF LOVE THIS VALENTINE’S DAY?
Here’s 7 ways to fill up your heart!
By Columnist Chris Benguhe – Author of Overcoming Life’s 7 Common Tragedies: Opportunities for Discovering God.
If you don’t have a special someone to spend Valentine’s Day with this weekend, all the extra amor in the air is bound to get you down.
If your heart is feeling like its running on empty, then why not fill it up with what Valentine’s Day is REALLY about – REAL love – not just romance! There is a whole lot more love around you then you realize.
Our lives are naturally enriched by surrounding ourselves with those that love us. From family to friends, and even people we meet for a moment in passing. We all can reinforce each other with love.
Here are 7 simple ways to find it and fill up your heart—
1. Visit an older friend or relative or simply stop by a senior center to share some goodwill and cheer.
2. Volunteer your time at a charity – St. Vincent de Paul is my favorite.
3. Pick one person who has helped you the most this year and bring them a Valentine’s gift just because.
4. Reach out to a neighbor.
5. Call a long lost friend or relative just to say hello.
6. Pick 5 people out who help you throughout the year and say thanks (hint – a police officer, your garbage man, your mail carrier and that cashier at the grocery store who always smiles and remembers your name for starters.)
7. Spend the day smiling and saying hello to everyone you encounter.
And remember it’s not about whether the glass is half full or half empty – it’s about the value of the glass. The glass of your life is always valuable because you can fill it up with lots of love!
Read more of Chris Benguhe’s inspirational thoughts in his latest book available at Amazon through the link below-
Chris Benguhe is a columnist for the Catholic Sun and the Author of “Overcoming Life’s 7 Common Tragedies: Opportunities for Discovering God.”
ALL MATERIALS ABOVE ©2007 by Chris Benguhe
A few weeks ago, I walked into my corner coffee shop expecting smiles and salutations because it was Valentine’s Day. Instead, half the people in there were down in the dumps because they had nobody to love.
I left the place wondering whether I should be in a bad mood, too. After all, I was single. (Egads!)
Our culture feeds us so much desperation when it comes to love that we all feel like if we don’t have a relationship, we’ve got nothing. But does Cupid have a monopoly on love?
I found my answer the next weekend at a big family gathering at my best friend’s house. His brother-in-law’s mother, Theresa, grew up in war-ravaged Vietnam, where she survived more than a few REAL heartaches.
Love finds a way
She was left behind in 1975 when Saigon fell, while her mother and sisters caught one of the last U.S. helicopters out. A year later, she and her husband and child escaped to Thailand, where they were imprisoned before being transferred into a refugee camp. They found asylum in France for three years before finally making it to America.
For the next 20 years, Theresa lived the American dream, working as a hairdresser and raising two children with her husband. But then it all fell apart. After 25 years of marriage, divorce robbed her of her identity. She wanted — and needed — to get it back.
She spent her vacation that year in France working with the poor at a Benedictine monastery, and it changed her life. Three months later, she left for a month-long retreat at a convent in Chile where she could work at a nearby hospice for the terminally ill. Theresa shaved them, bathed and dressed them. She ate with the nuns and lived like a nun, studying and praying.
But still something was missing. “I was afraid I was going to get sick,” explained Theresa. “There was no real hygiene, no gloves. I asked God, why do I have to do this? Maybe I can serve God in some other way.”
Theresa found her answer in an old man with sores covering his body. “I could never bring myself to touch him,” recalled Theresa. “Then one day he begged me for help into the tub. I decided to touch him with no gloves. I washed him, slowly and kindly. Then I put cream on his body. God came into my heart. I lost my fear and my pain.”
A change of heart
From that day on, dirty diapers, dysentery, the smells, the ghastly sights, none of it bothered her anymore.
When she returned to America, one of her customers, Mrs. Miller, had died. She went to see Mr. Miller to express her condolences and found a shell of a man.
The 83-year-old former economist who still worked as an expert witness was in good shape physically and financially, but after losing his wife of 60 years, he also lost his will to live.
Theresa had an idea. She invited him to Chile with her the next time she went, hoping it would help him like it helped her. But Mr. Miller was Jewish and felt uncomfortable going to a Catholic convent. He politely declined.
A few months later Theresa headed back to Chile, this time for a year.
At the Mother Teresa Congregation, she tended to 36 handicapped children, feeding them, playing with them and rehabilitating them. Then she headed off to the Little Sisters of the Poor nursing home for the elderly. Finally, she cut hair one day a week for the poor in the chapel.
One day, Mr. Miller called. He’d had a change of heart.
He joined her there for two weeks, and just like Theresa, he lived, worked and prayed with the nuns. He cleaned, bathed and fed the weak and the sick. “When I was in America I felt so old,” he told Theresa one day. “Now I feel young. I want to live again.”
Mr. Miller returned five times that year to work with Theresa. When he left for the last time, the poor, the hungry and the infirmed all gathered and embraced him.
Theresa returned to Maryland later that year and was asked by Mr. Miller’s daughter to take care of her father full time. She agreed.
And they both lived happily ever after, with a whole lot of love to show for it.
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