One More Day Alive

Last month, just a few weeks before Thanksgiving, I walked into a coffee shop I frequent and the ever-effervescent girl behind the counter was ashen face, with smears of wiped-away tears revealing what her brave face was otherwise trying to hide. She was in trouble.

“What’s wrong?” I asked sincerely and quietly, making sure we had a private moment.

“I can’t pay my rent this month, and I think my daughter and I will be kicked out of our apartment. I really don’t know what to do.” She went on to explain the personal series of unforeseen events that had led to a shortfall this month, almost too ashamed to elaborate.

Luckily I know a few things about how to get help in such situations. I told her to contact her local St. Vincent de Paul which assists those in short-term financial need with help paying their rents or mortgages as well as for utilities and groceries.

Things worked out. Thank God I asked. But what if I hadn’t? And what if she hadn’t told me?

A couple of years back, I wrote about the importance of asking for help. Since then the world has been turned upside down financially, and this Christmas there are even more people in need in this nation. If you are one of them, don’t be afraid, ashamed or just plain too shy to ask for help.

God wants you to get help if you need it. In fact, if you don’t ask, you are doing yourself, God and the rest of the world a big disservice.

Here’s why. Answer these simple questions: Do you enjoy helping others? Do you grow in your spirit and in your relationship with God and others when you help? Of course you do. What would happen to you if others never allowed you to help them? That would be denying you all the grace that you receive through loving others.

You should be proud of your need. Because it allows people to help you, and enables God to work through them in your life, bestowing grace upon them as well.

So if you don’t allow others to help you, you are denying them their access to that same grace. And the only way that others really know you need help is if you ask for it.

God created us to live in community with each other. He designed us to need each other. I am not smart enough to understand everything God did and does, but I do know what is in the Bible. And the idea that we are created in the image of God and that all human life is sacred and innately valuable is irrefutable.

If all that is true, do you think that God wants you to disrespect yourself or subject yourself to abuse? Denying yourself the love and support of others who God works through is not respecting yourself and others.

Now all of this is not a rubber stamp for all those children out there to spend the next couple of weeks nagging their parents for all the toys their hearts desire. I am clearly talking about those who are in true human need reaching out to others.

And that also doesn’t mean you cannot give at the same time as you receive in whatever way you can. Though you may not believe it right now, you reaching out may allow someone else to talk about their needs, to share with you their feelings or simply to cultivate a new relationship or deepen an old one in a way that will help that person now or in the future.

For instance, a few weeks later I rushed out of the house without my wallet — and the coffee was on the house.

Merry Christmas!

Anyone who would like to contribute to the Society of St. Vincent de Paul may do so by calling (602) 850-6737. Those needing help this Christmas can contact their local parish SVdP

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